The Real Feeling that hurts...

Well Christmas came and left and so did New Years and for those who didn't know I spent New Years in Atlantic City...WOW I was so excited and by time I got there all I wanted was that New Years kiss and that wonderful man of mine to look at me and tell me through his eyes what I thought he felt. Boy was I wrong. So I got the kiss and the hug and whispers of how much he cared and couldn't wait till we could be together more, for those who don't know about the situation I will fill you in real quick because thats how long this lasted...I met this NAVY boy from VA who is originally from NJ and at first I was hestitant about it; one he is younger than me, two the whole long distance thing and last but definatly not least I have been hurt bad before and wasn't ready to get real involved but something about him drew me close and feelings got real strong and according to him he felt the same and it wasn't to get me into the sack cuz that didn't happen for a while...anywho we talked on the phone everyday many times for almost a month and then decided to take it a step further and have that title...eekkkkk boyfriend and girlfriend...so I went to VA for his NAVY xmas party and then to NJ and met his parents and friends from home, ok things were going great I was actually for the first time in a long time serious about this kid and he was already talking about our future together, yes a little soon I know but I had THAT FEELING...so I ran with it and it was great, now he was up here in Ohio one time to meet me in person before we actully got that title, so then Christmas and New YEars was coming and he was getting his leave from 12/29-1/9 so we decided I would go there for the weekend of New Years and I bought another plane ticket to go there and at this time things were still going real good and he seemed to really care and still talking about our future...so come Christmas day that FEELING started turning on me but I thought to myself "don't jump to conclusions not every guy is evil and out to hurt you" because he started with that shady shit guys do...you know "I am at a friends house and I am busy I will call you later" and when you ask what is going on you get the "nothing I am hanging out" Well because he does live on a ship with a shit load of people I let it go and understood that if one of his friends has a house it is ok he hangs out with whoever I TRUST HIM. Well now lets get to this lovely weekend I had just experienced...So I am in NJ having a great time with my boyfriend and meeting even more of his friends and family and we are discussing the weekend coming up (he is coming to Ohio) before he has to go back to the ship and everything is still going great. News YEars night comes and goes and all I thought about was what a great way to bring in the New YEars with a guy I plan on being with and building a future with, you know like he told me. So Monday morning comes and it is time for him to take me to the airport...as we are still in NJ and talking about me moving to VA and he says "well you know if you move down there you wouldn't have to live by yourself" so of course I am thinking to myself "ok he is serious about us" not that i am going to only move there for him because I actually was trying to move there with my job b4 I met him...Monday comes and goes and now it is Tuesday and I didn't talk to him for most of the day, he was sleeping like usual, and that DAMN FEELING IS BACK IN MY STOMACH AND HEART AGAIN, so when I finally talk to him I asked what was wrong and he said that he needed some space, SPACE DON"T WE HAVE LIKE 400 miles BETWEEN US? So he said that I call him too much, um HELLO he use to call me 20 times a day to, so when I get home we talk online and he says R U MAD? Well at this point that feeling was strong and I knew it wasn't good...and to make an even longer story short he comes at me with...I need my space BLAH BLAH I am confused, I don't want a serious relationship, we need to slow down, BLAH BLAH then that feeling came out of his mouth I CAN"T BE WITH YOU! He says "I do care about you and that is why I am telling you this now" UM HI don't you think you should have about a month ago? I mean he is such a nice kid and I really didn't expect this but hey when THAT FEELING COMES THE FIRST TIME I GUESS I SHOULD HAVE NOT LET IT HURT ME. So no Ohio visit single again and another heartbreak, I really care about him and I am just wondering...is it ever going to be my time?